bye bye junior year...I miss you already

I am officially done with my junior year of college. I spent last night with my roommate, Steph, watching Bride Wars and making friendship anklets. It was our last night that we will have ever shared a room and honestly it was kinda weird. I have lived in the same room as her for two years now and I can honestly say that I will miss it. It is just really nice to have someone that you are so close with be there all the time. Having her around makes it really difficult to go to bed upset, especially because we always end up having some kind of random laughing outbursts at random times throughout the night.

I spent all of yesterday afternoon packing. I will say that packing and I do not get along. I was miserable, the heat in our room was on, and of course moving all my stuff around really was exhausting. I had to stop often to take a breather and Steph helped me get my stuff in my car. I am used to moving out stuff randomly throughout the semester, but this semester I moved out everything except my fridge in one trip. Today, I helped Steph load her car,  I figured it was the least I could do...

As I write this blog I am realizing how I don't feel right while writing it. I am on the verge on tears as I look back on the past few days and this semester. As much as I complain about my suite mates, they really are my best friends. 

Steph and I both checked out at the same time today, 1PM on the dot. As I handed in my key to the RA I just thought, "oh my gosh...this really is it..." I hugged everyone goodbye and Steph and I both headed to our cars...as we split apart I remembered that I will see her next Wed, so it wasn't too tearful...but I got in my car...started to drive away and then the tears came...kinda like they are now...

I know I will see them all again next semester, but it is just hard to separate from my 3 best friends, the 3 girls that have helped hold me together, who helped cheer me up whenever I had a bad day, and the ones who would sit and listen to me ramble about my fears...

It has only been a few hours, I have already had a random skype convo with Steph, but I miss them already...

My friends at school get me...my friends at home don't...my friends at home have drifted away from me as I have drifted far from them...it was for the better...I know that... but it is when I come home that I feel most alone.